Posted on October 4, 2012
Resting from war…
And then the temperature drops and the fan is not needed. The first night without it was eery. I could hear–everything. Normal sounds marked the passing of the night. The fridge running, the cars outside driving past, even a neighbor or two taking a late walk seemed unusual.
Such a normal change of seasons seemed somehow abnormal.
But more than the fan of summer is changing. A month or so ago, the Holy Spirit stood up and made Himself known as I was reading Joshua. A verse read through many times before demanded to be noticed:
“Then the land had rest from war.” –Joshua 14:14, NKJV
No more reading. No more study. Still, I have not returned to studying Joshua because that verse sits, like a flower bud in my soul, slowly unfolding as I realize what God may mean for it in my life.
Life has its challenges for everyone, I am no different. We experience times of war, times of struggle, times of heartache. And we experience joys, contentments, and moments where we feel 100% certain we are exactly where Jesus wants us to be.
Struggle marks certain areas of my life for over a decade. I put those things above God, and He, like the gracious Almighty He is, waged war against them. I cognitively knew the stakes. I held tight while also begging to be let go. And I grew tired.
There is no longer war because I chose to let Him decide. There is no longer war because Jesus battled the things that would enslave me so that I would be free. A calm I prayed for, cried for, begged for has come, and I have no idea what to do with it.
“Then the land had rest from war.”
If you need me, I will be here, meditating on the rest part, understanding the lessons that came from the war part, and mulling.
Image by Miguel Saavedra